Things I Hate And People Who Should Die...Volume I

I have been told by numerous people that this site needed to be created so I could vent my frustrations about things that I hate and certain people who should no longer grace this earth. So here are my initial 9....

1) I really hate guys who spike their hair to go to the gym. You are not cool and girls definitely do not want you. You are about to sweat like a pig, yet you find it necessary to play dress up. Do us all a favor and lock yourself in your bedroom, pop a couple bottles of pills and never come out again.

2) People who bring groceries on the el. Look, I know you are probably really old, mentally ill and poor as a bag of sand but that is no excuse for placing discomfort onto others. I do not want your bags full of vitamins and asparagus rubbing legs with me. Buy a car or take a taxi like the rest of the population and quit pissing me off.

3) People who drink out of straws for no good reason. All I can ask is why? Does your jaw not function at the pace of everyone else? You look utterly stupid sipping from that straw, not to mention the fact that you slurp and drool all over the damn thing. Just stop living for God's sake.

4) People, usually teenagers/young adults, who consider themselves to be 'Emo'. This one is a biggie. First, your music sucks ass. "Oh look at me I'm so emotional, I wear my heart on my sleeve and cry when I'm by myself." If you feel the need to be 'Emo' and express your depressed feelings in stupid ways then I have a great one for you: Go to the store, buy a knife and get to work on your mid-section. Everyone hates you anyways so stop bugging us with your personal self-hate problems.

5) Fanny packs. This one is directed at you Hulk Hogan. Does anyone really need to tell you that fanny packs are ridiculously queer? You may be able to bench press 400 pounds but that fanny pack has replaced your sack with a vagina. What do you keep in there anyways? And while I'm on it Hulk, your show sucks too. You and the people who watch it should die just out of common courtesy to the rest of the nation.

6) Socks & Sandles. I once knew a guy who wore socks & sandles. This was also the same guy who rode around in a motorized wheelchair with his head down all day and got peanuts stuck in his belly button. I think that is all that's necessary here.

7) While I'm on it, I really hate motorized wheelchairs. Yes, you did just run over my foot and now I'm going to kick your ass. I mean you are crippled, the least you could do is physically push around a wheelchair so maybe your arms can save some dignity of your otherwise useless anatomy.

8) Children. This one is very broad, but true. I'm not a fan of any kids ages 0-16. You scream, cry on planes, whine a lot, use diapers, are messy, have a great disregard for other people and smell. The serve no needed service to the world....go away.

And lastly 9) The parents of these same children. Do you know how to be a parent? There really should be laws outlawing certain people to have children. You make the rest of the world suffer because you let your kid run wild and scream like a hog. Every time you come into a room with your infant or ritalin charged 12 year old the rest of the room cringes at your mere presence. Please stop making your stupid personal life choices our problem. You should be put in jail for the way you let your child act. While your in there, smuggle in a noose and jump off your top bunk.

That is all. Thank you for your time.